


1,000 Kisses

by woodentarantula



Category: Persona 3
Genre: Multi, a l s o t h e d o g, also u know Exactly who that major character death is, dont be scared of minato/ken its Innocent, im planning on doing more but ill add the tags when i get there
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-22
Updated: 2016-03-22
Packaged: 2018-05-28 08:20:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6322024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woodentarantula/pseuds/woodentarantula
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With many people, as they progress through life, they collect a thousand kisses. The ones that do happen, and the ones that don't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1,000 Kisses

Yukari isn’t very subtle about anything. You’re not sure if you return her feelings but you’d feel awful rejecting her when it took her so long to actually say something. So you agree to go out with her, even if you would feel more comfortable as friends or even like siblings.

There’s a night when she follows you to your room and you’re terrified that she wants more than you’re willing to give but she sits in your desk chair and talks. You’re good enough with that so you lean against the table and let her spill everything she needs. Yukari tells you about her father’s letter, about family dinners and christmases and halloweens that she’ll never have again. She starts tearing up, droplets falling silently to her knees but soon they come as large wracking sobs. You shift over and take her in your arms, press your hands into her back and let her cry into your shoulder. When Yukari’s quieted down she stares at your chest and refuses to look at you, a small angry red glow shining in her eyes. You let your impulses take over and press your mouth gently to the corners of her eyes, then the apples of her her cheeks, to her forehead and nose and eyelids until shes a giggling and blushing mess but never pushing away.

* * *

 

Junpei is ridiculous and brash and you’re not quite sure what he’s looking for with you. He keeps calling you his friend, his “best bud” but he stands too close and speaks to carefully when it's only you to think that what he’s saying is true. You dont have a burning desire to help him tackle his internalized whatever and when Chidori comes along you’re comfortable passing that responsibility off to her.

You still go out together to karaoke or the arcade. It’s as friends of course, Junpei stresses this. Sometimes Kenji tags along, sometimes he doesn’t. There’s a dance machine at the arcade that you and Junpei play in versus. A couple of snooty looking girls stand by the machine next to yours and bet ¥1000 that they could beat the the two of you in a team battle. Junpei heartily agrees and slaps the money down on the console while they pick the hardest song on the most soul crushing difficulty. It’s ungodly fast; by the end your feet ache and your head thrums with the beat of sneakers on plastic, but you manage to win. You hadn’t noticed but a crowd had gathered and while they cheer and clap, Junpei throws an arm around your shoulders and kisses your cheek triumphantly. He immediately reels back, apologising but you give him a kiss to match and say it’s alright.

* * *

Akihiko’s skull is made of brick, you swear, but if it is them his fists are iron and his heart is rose gold. He’s  _ loud,  _ sometime too much for your head but other times it riles you up, his shouts in Tartarus make it all feel like a game you could win rather than this awful responsibility.

It’s late, when you’re sure everything is coming to a close. It should be at least, you’ve beat everything that’s come your way and if you’re remembering the order right, you’ve got the hanged man to defeat and that’s it, you’re done.

The night is quiet and still. Akihiko and Koromaru sit alone and restless in the lounge. You offer Koro a walk and invite Akihiko to come along. It ends up as more of a run and the three of you collapse on the bench by the jungle gym, panting, red-faced, and laughing. As your breathing calms, he asks if you’re scared. You ask if he’s excited. You agree that it’s a bit of both. You raise your hand to his neck and he doesn’t flinch, only gives you a confused look. You ask if you can kiss him. He says yes.

* * *

 

Mitsuru is so quiet compared to the others that you worry something’s wrong. Of course, yes, everything is wrong, but that’s just how she is. She takes charge when she needs to but draws back when too much emotion might show. 

So you’re careful when you talk to her, feel your way blind till she’s ready to give you a light. You’re sorry that it wasn’t of her own accord that you found out about the man she was supposed to be with. The whole situation was sick, made the walls of your stomach ache and you tell her as much. She relays that he never did much, never assaulted her, though he stole her first kiss and that never sat well. You tell her that is doesn’t have to count, doesn’t have to mean anything like that if she doesn’t want it to. You think she’s going to ask you and that’s fine, you put yourself in that position, but she doesn’t. She nods with a smile, thanks you, then offers to get food and head home. You think that sounds nice.

* * *

Fuuka is serene and trustworthy and you welcome her addition to the team. Despite how small she seems and how soft her voice is, Fuuka seems to help the team stay together a little easier. She is scared though, you can feel it. You try to help her however you can. You’ve asked her about hobbies, common courtesy taking over, but she waved you off and continued talking about her cooking. You’re not sure why she’s so fixed on this; it only ever seems to bring her heartache and self-deprecation. It must be some personal goal, however, so you don’t tell her to stop.

She invites you to her room so the two of you can page through cooking books without someone from school asking uncomfortable questions. The strong fragrance of flowers slaps you in the face as soon as you enter. Fuuka laughs gently when you stagger back the slightest bit. She asks if it’s still okay but you wave your hands and insist it’s fine. Your eye catches the mess of cables and notebooks that clutter her desk. You ask her about it and she says some technical jargon that you don’t get. Something having to do with “big data” that she was sifting through. You nod along like you understand and motion for her to go on. Her eyes light up and starts going on about the “inter-workings of Scala” and how switching between it and Java is tricky sometimes. You make some weak joke about how the only java you know is what they serve at Chagall. She laughs again and compares it to when you switch from English back to Japanese and your tongue feels weird for a while.

The conversation comes to a natural lull. Fuuka looks out her tiny dorm window at the setting sun and the tree branches tapping on the grass. She states in her soft voice that she’s scared. You don’t press her but she goes on anyway. She doesn’t think she really likes boys the way the girls at school describe it, like Yukari talks about. You tell her she doesn’t have to, that she’s fine where she is right now. You ruffle her bangs a little and she grins. 

* * *

 

Aigis is kind and gentle, you find, despite her whirring gears and fans or the constant clang of metal that follows her. You’ve watched her hold flowers, that one cat, and your hand so delicately, like they were all fashioned of the finest glass and could break at the slightest pressure. 

She holds you like this as you sit in your room, cross-legged on your bed, leaning against her chest as you play a videogame Junpei has lent you. The mechanics are boring and the story is lacking, but you have little else to do and Aigis said she didn’t mind some quiet time. Her arms encircle your waist, resting lightly on your legs. One arm comes up, the hand lays against your shoulder and starts etching small shapes on your t-shirt. It’s kinda nice and you focus on it for a moment. There’s lines and curves but nothing seems connected. At your inquiry, Aigis tells you it’s binary, a translation of an old American poem she stumbled upon while doing research. She traces the hem of your shirt where the first line was written. She recites it and translates it to Japanese for you. You recognize it as Thanatopsis from your brief study of American romantics last year. You don’t comment on it. 

She asks if she could do something that may be considered overstepping boundaries. You agree and she presses her lips to the back of your neck. It’s quick and feather light so all you register is how cold she is before she’s already pulling away. She apologises and you tell her it’s fine, returning to your game.

* * *

 

Ken is small but strong and you try your best not to baby him, but it’s hard sometimes. There’s no denying that he’s younger than the others, it’s just a fact but because of it you feel compelled to help him. 

It’s a particularly grueling night in Tartarus. A week of tests left you all too exhausted to fight and there’s still a good ten floors to scale by the end of the week. You’re all tired but Ken looks like he’s about to fall over. You don't really know how hard elementary school works their kids these days but when you ask if he’s okay he confesses that he doesn't feel well. Yukari tries a healing spell but to no avail. You suggest that he return to the lobby. He agrees and you kneel on the ground in front of him. At his confused look you tell him to get on your back. His face screws up but Akihiko tells him not to worry, he’s had to carry Junpei on his back before and they don’t think any less of him. Ken laughs a little and climbs on you, though you can nearly feel his burning blush on the back of your neck.

You find the teleporter easily enough, dropping him off and leaving again, this time with Aigis in tow. You have to fix your strategy a little bit, but it’s no bother. You’d rather he be resting and not get hurt in his tired state. When you return you’re dragging your feet, but you present Elizabeth the document and tell Fuuka you’re gonna head back. She nods and everyone follows you on the trek back to the dorm. Ken comes up to you a walks silently for a minute before taking hold of your hand and bringing it to his lips. At your questioning face he tells you he saw it in a movie, that you kiss the hand of someone you admire, that you’re thankful for. You smile as gently as you manage and thank him.

* * *

 

Koromaru confuses you. You understand that he’s loyal, that he wants to help, but he’s a dog. It takes the longest time for it to click in your head that a dog with a knife is fighting and can control a powerful demon-hound and that you frequently trust him with your life. 

The dorm is silent, the lounge empty. Club activities ran late, you’d guess, though you’re not really sure what Junpei or Fuuka might be up to. Hopefully plans with friends, the both of them could use that sort of thing. You’ve had plans every day this past week and all you really want now is to eat, study a little, and get to sleep at a sensible time. You rummage in the little kitchen and find a cup ramen that you throw in the microwave. As you punch in a minute Koromaru trots up to you and nuzzles on your shin. You say hello and inform him that he probably shouldn’t share the ramen with you. It’s not even very good for humans, it can’t be good for dogs. He barks in assent and you poke around the cupboards a bit more, finding his bag of food and pouring a bowl out. He munches happily while the microwave alerts you that your food is done. You grab it and flop on the couch, taking a novel from your school bag. When you recline back to read, Koromaru jumps on your legs, making his way up your chest and resting his head on your collar bone, staring forlornly into your eyes. You scratch his ear a little, telling him you really must read a few chapters for the quiz tomorrow. He whines slightly so you tell him he can stay. He yapps happily and licks your nose. You laugh a little, scratching his head again. 

* * *

 

Shinjiro is distant and you respect that. You like to think you have that in common, but you’ve been so close to people recently that you’re not sure anymore. Whichever way, you don’t push him to talk to you. You wish you had. 

The eulogy at school is awful. You wanted to scream at the kids in front of you like Junpei had. You want to run up to the casket, see Shinjiro’s face, make sure that it wasn’t a mistake, that this is really happening. You fought beside him last week, defeated beings that are an embodiment of turmoil, and you won. Every time you won and went on to the next one, did it again and again. You can’t bring yourself to believe that now is different, that now there’s no spell or item that could fix this. 

As bad an experience as the assembly is, you come back to the hall after the release bell. You see Akihiko jump on the stage, hear his little tirade, watch Caesar appear. You feel a little guilty for watching it, but Akihiko striders out the door opposite you soon enough, conviction in his step for the first time since the 4th. 

You make your way to the stage, coming down on your hunches, resting your arms on the cold steel of the coffin. You thank him, to start with. Thank him for what he’s done, how he helped. You tell him about how Akihiko’s been hurting, how you know he’ll be fine now. You ask if he’s still here with them, if that’s part of what Caesar is. You’re pretty sure Nemesis is Ken’s mom, in a way, so it makes sense. You apologize. There’s no need to bring that up now. Ken’s torn up too, but he’s smart. He’s figured it out, you think; if he hasn’t now he will soon. Silenece passesfor a few moments, you study the flowers around his frame. They’re garish and don’t really suit him. You briefly wonder if you would get the name ugly lilac colored flowers if you were to die during school. You thank him again, for protecting Ken, for looking after Akihiko. You don’t really think you could say it enough. You press your lips to the unyielding metal, a goodbye kiss you tell him, and leave the way you came.

**Author's Note:**

> i plan on doing at least one more chapter for a version with Kotone! i haven't even sketched out anything for that and im going on a trip soon so that probably wont happen for a little while. I'm temped to do chapters for Souji and p5-kun. Thoughts?


End file.
